one good day.

so i think i had a good day today. my boss tolled me that i will get $.50 cents more starting now so now i make $8.00 and hour YAHOOOOOOO!!!! then at the end of the day i went to talk to HR to talk about insurance and my Aflac. well i have insurance starting today and she will talk to Aflac and get me papers to fill out so i can get money from them. YAHOOO!!! so far it is looking good. did i tell u i am losing weight too. YAHOOOO!!!

thinking positive!

well the girl who was pregnant with me she had a girl yesterday so every one was talking about today. man, i was so bummed out today. but i got over it. now she will come to work to show off her little girl. it's not fair !!!!!!!!! it is so hard to go to work and every were i go i see happy pregnant girls. it is so hard. ok (think positive, think positive !) ok i am thinking positive in 1 month me and mike are going to try again. for some reason i might have a boy i don't know why i think this but i do. witch is ok that just means if we have a boy we have to try again so i can have a girl. i was just thinking. wouldn't it be weird if we had a boy or a girl and the baby looked just like Riley??? that would be SO weird. but it would be good too. how many kids will we have 2 ,3 or more??? hmmmm well i do not care i always wanted a big family. i will get pregnant this summer and i know i will hate it cuz it's so hot but it would be so cool to show off my pregnant belly so i hope i get a cute one again. cuz i did have a cute belly with Riley and every one knows it too. but what am i going to do if i get as big as Becky or Sarah? wow they were big!! so i will walk and not be lazy like i was before. it will be great. i can't wait. 1 more month and we get to start trying. if the Doc. say's it is ok i mean. we will see.

just another day!

sorry i have not been writing on my blog but i have been busy every day after work i went to baby site the kids. so i just got home from work and a girl from work who is pregnant is in labor and should have her kid i think by tonight. i think she is having a boy. she is keeping everyone up dated by the hour for some reason. work is getting better. every now and again some one asks me about the baby but it's getting easier to tell them. me and mike are going to wait 1 more month and then we are going to try to have another baby. i know it will take awhile and that's ok with me. i know it will suck beaning pregnant in the summer but i don't care i just want to fell my baby kick like it should. Riley died before she could really kick. i know that we should wait until everything is up to date but if u have never been in my satiation u will never really understand how it feels. i am trying to look past this and think of good things. so anyways everything is going ok for now and getting back to my life. so nothing new has happened to me just alot of thinking and everyone knows this blog is for me so i can wright down the things i am thinking . so in a few years i can look back and read it so if u don't want to say anything that's ok. i miss been pregnant and i want a family with mike. i can't see my self with any one else. i know times are tough right now but i know they will get better. so have a good day.

a better tomorrow!

well i am sorry about yesterday i was in a bad mood. so anyways i went to the job interview in evleth and they said they will call me some times next week. but i put my app. in at f & f the gas station in town and they said we will see and i put my app. in were Jo works the old farts home. i had 1 interview there and i am going back tomorrow after work for another one and the boss there said that because of my last name that i am a shoe in because he loves Jo. it is a midnight shift and i really don't have to do anything really. so we will see tomorrow.maybe he will say yes u got the job u can start Monday night. so cross your fingers. i am hoping my bad luck is turning in to good luck now. so if i get this job i will not be blogging allot cuz i will be sleeping allot.

everything is going wrong!

well work is getting better. i can't wait for payday. i am So broke. i thought i had money but i have no money so i do not know what i am going to do. i don't get payed until 2 weeks. so anyways i have a job interview tomorrow. i hope i get it. i don't know how i am going to go there every day but i will think of something. it pays good so we will see when i get payed from that job if i get it. but i am going to keep my other job also so i will i hope have 2 jobs because i can't live this way. there is not allot of good jobs around here so i hope i get it. but did u know life sucks? did u notice when u need the money u don't have any at all. nothing has been going right since Riley but we are getting by some how i just don't know how cuz we have no money. mike said he is getting food but i don't know how he is. cuz he has no money i have no money so who knows how we are going to get food. sorry if this is depressing but this is how it is right now. anyways whatever right. i know people are having a harder time in life then us so i am not complaning or anything. i just want to say life sucks when it really sucks. so nothing good happened in my life so this is it. i am just hopping it will get better soon. i hope u are having a better day then me.

LIFE!

so how is everyone going???? sorry i have not put up nothing but i have been lazy and tired. this weekend is crazy at work we have a full house. we have 173 rooms to clean. anyways my car broke down and Adam is fixing it thank goodness. i hope i will get it back tomorrow. everything at work is going ok. i am a little defencive of everything. but it's ok i think everyone understands it. i have a job interview on Tuesday and i hope i get it cuz i really need the money. i guess it's easy and i can make good money there. i think this a bad year for us cuz there is always something going wrong. but whatever i say. i will get over it. anyways i have to tell u something mom my comp is all screwed up i hope u can come over soon to fix it or something. well i do not have any scary storeys to tell. there are so Meany pregnant woman at work and i can't stand it. i am so jealous of them cuz they are so happy. i know i will be like that some day soon again. but that's all the news i have today i know it's boring but this is my life. so have a good night and a better tomorrow.

day 2 on the job.

well my second day on the job. still a little nerves but doing good. well everything went kinda good. this morning i was showing some one my tattoo and guess who was right there ?? jean !!!!!! so she talked as loud as she could and said " oh i was just going to tell her about your tattoo oh by the way (to the girl next to her ) do U want to see her tattoo ?" so i bitched her out. i tooled her she had no right to tell everyone about my tattoo it was my business who i tell. and it wasn't just another tattoo. it was for my daughter. i tolled her to shut up and mind her business, yesterday she said that every bad thing happens is a gift we just don't know it. so i tooled her this was NO gift. this was pure hell and beyond for me, mike and my whole family. so i think i scared her off cuz now she won't even look at me. hehehehehe. Sarah u would have been proud. well after that everything was good. when i was done with work and went to have a smoke in the break room this girl came up to me and asked how far along was i. so i tooled her i lost my baby and then i left to go work out at the gym and almost started to cry a few times. that was so hard. anyways there is a girl who i work with and she is i think 4 or 5 months and we started talking about baby stuff and oh my god i miss that so much. so me and mike were talking last night about when we want to start trying again and i tooled him as soon as i am done taking my medicine and wait 1 week after so it's out of my system. i thought i could wait for about 3 months but we can't. i want a baby. we are ready to have a baby. we were ready for Riley. yes i know i should louse all this fat but i know now that i don't have to feed my face in the beginning. i am going to work out the whole time. please do not tell me we are not ready this is up to us. just be happy about it. we are ready.

work!

well i am back from work and it went good. nobody asked me anything. some tolled me it was good that i am back . i got 1 hug. everything was going great until some old woman seen my tattoo and announces it to the whole room that i have it and i had to show it off. that was not cool. i all most started to cry because it's not just another tattoo to me. then she said that everything that goes wrong turns in to a blessing in some way. i wanted to slap her because that is NO blessing. no mater what way u look at it. then she said god might think u were not ready for it. i have no idea why some one would say such a thing to something like this. well anyways i wanted to go work out after work but my foot hurt so i just came home. so we will see tomorrow. dad guess who that old bat was who said that stuff to me??? jean!!!!!!!!!!

back to work.

well tomorrow i go back to work yahoo!!! i have to wake up at 6am hopefully i can wake up that early again. it's been a while. but i am some what nerves and excited about it. getting back to normal i guess. i know some will just look at me with sympathy and others will ask and i know who it will be cuz she is the only person from work who called me when she found out. i don't mind telling her cuz she is kinda nice but the other ones just want to be noisy. but as soon as i am done working i am going to there gym to start working out. i can't wait. anyways come back tomorrow to see what happened.

spring is coming!

such a beautiful day in the neighborhood don't u think?

this is mike!

well i think i am going to be ok my foot doesn't really hurt any more and i can walk on it now. but i have to take cephalexin for 10 days. so it's all good. well i just realized that my year has not started out so good. who knows what else is going to happen too me. i don't know but i think mike is bad luck cuz ever since i meet him nothing has been going good. but i still love the guy. so what can i do??? the thing is when i tolled mike about what happened to me he was well i am glad u are ok and hung up u know. and that was on Friday and he has not called to check up on me since. i guess he is not to worried and having to much fun cuz he is at his son's grandparents this weekend with his son. don't get me wrong i like our time apart and everything but he could have called to see if i am doing ok. but whatever u know. in the pic up there is mike he is a nice,sweet guy but he can be a bone head some times. he might look scary but he is not. that is just for looks. he is like a big teddy bear in side. u know bikes are suppose to look like they are a bad asses but he is a good guy.

i am hurting!

well i just thought it was another boring day today. until i tryed to move my left foot! it hurt SO bad so i looking at it and it was getting swollenso i looked at my right foot and it looked normal. so me and mom went in to see the doc. i needed help cuz i could not walk it hurt to much. the doc. said it might be an infection. so he gave me cephalexin and i take that every 6 hours and naproxen i take that twice a day.

and sent me home with.

so this is what i am eating so i can take the naproxen. and not be in pain.
so this was a good beginging to my day. i was going to go to work monday but i have a doc. app. to see if it is getting better. but if it gets worse by tomorrow i have to go see him tomorrow. so do i have good luck or what???

my tat's

this is my first tat, i got this one a year ago. i love the saying cuz i say it all the time. she is my little she devil. this one is on my right arm.

this is my secont tat. i love taz. this one is on my right leg.

this is my angel. i got this on on the 11th. this one is on my left arm. they do hurt but it is worth it in the end.

good news!

well i had an app. with my doc. today. we talked about what happened and what he will do to make shore this will not happen again and what i can do. i have to stop smoking and NO ONE can smoke around me. i have to stop drinking pop and eat better. he also said that as soon as we are ready to have another baby and i said about 3 mouths or so. we will want to try again. he said to tell him right away so he can get me on vitamins. he will be vary up to date with everything give me more test, more ultrasounds and by 26 weeks i get to go every 2 weeks instead of every month. he is going to give me an ultrasound that will see how much the baby moves and if the baby moves allot it's good but if it is not that would mean the placenta is going bad and we would have to deliver the baby A.S.A.P. he said he is going to pull all the stops and check for everything. he will show me how to keep track on how much the baby moves. i will be height risk. me and Mike are vary happy about what he said. the Doc. also said that because i was doing so good he didn't have to worry about me and Riley. but now he knows that no matter what my test are i am high risk. i am vary happy about it cuz i know the next time we get pregnant my baby will not die. we are in good hands i think. so if i want to louse all this weight before i get pregnant again i better work my ass off.

she devil!

hello again, well only 2 weeks left until i go back to work and i will be a little nerves. some of my co-worked would not ask anything but some others would want to know everything. they are going to ask why i didn't notice something wrong with the baby. and all i can tell them i don't know i guess i was to happy to and to excited, i thought she was sleeping allot i didn't know something like this could happen. then there is this one girl who is going to have her baby by the end of this month. since she found out she thought she was better then me cuz i didn't do everything by the book like she did. i did what i thought was right. well i went over to work like 2 weeks ago and she was there and she didn't even care i was there. she just stuck her nose up in the air and keeped on working. she probably thinks i did this to my baby. i think as soon as she has her baby and comes back she is going to rub it in my nose cuz that is the kind of chick she is now. well who ever knows me knows if this chick says something she shouldn't say to me i will have to get my piss and vinegar out and find Sarah's piss and vinegar and let her have it.

my baby girl!

this is my baby girl. she was a sweet little baby, she didn't do anything wrong she was happy. she liked to kick and play in my ribs and she loved to sit on my Balder. she loved her mommy and daddy but every time she hired her daddy she would go nuts.

this is where my little girl it today.

broke down!

well we all jumped in adam's car and we got about an hour and a half away and we turned around cuz the check engine light went on and off the whole way. we were so worried coming back. we didn't know if we were going to make it back. there was no heat in the car it was getting louder, the windows were fogging up and there was smoke coming from the back so we called JO and we seen her and we new we were going to be ok. but we finally made it back and as soon as adam stoped the car it really stared to smoke from the hood of the car. but as soon as he looked at it it was nothing big so he went to go buy the part and fixed it and i think it will be ok for now. it was fun. so that was my road trip bec's was sad we didn't come but i am glad we made it home in one peace. i guess i am bad luck or adam's car is worse then mine. anyways have a good day people.

road trip!

hello again i am going on a road trip with my big brother and his 2 little girls i am so excited i think we are going to Becky's but u never know with Adam. ok i am kinda scared too cuz if u know my brother he drives crazy so we will see. so wish me luck every body. and i will see u when i get back. poor Mikey has to stay home all by him self. i think he can Handel it but we will see.it will be SO much fun i think.!

no water!

today i woke up to brush my teeth and there was NO water. and i am not going to have any water for almost 2 days. the water heather was acting up and we would have hot water in the morning and every morning my boyfriend takes a shower so i will stink if i have to but do not worrie bec i will take a shower before i come over to your house. they are draining the water heaters cuz they said there was sand or some thing like that at the bottom and they have to get that out. so i hope it only takes 2 days if not i will be stinky when i go to bec's house. well i have some good news for my readers. my landlord said i should have hot water in like an hour so do not worrie bec i will not stink when i come over. so that's all the excitment i will be having to day. well have a good day people.

my first blog

hello every one and welcome my name as u know is ally. this is my first blog. i hope i am doing it right. i found out to day by my doc. what happened to my baby girl. and i do not know what to say about it but i hope it doesn't happen again the placenta was bad it didn't give her anything the cells in it were bad she didn't get any food or air or blood. he doesn't know why this happened he said it was a fluke i am hoping he is right. i am going to the doc's monday and we will talk more about it then. so who ever see's this let me know how i am doing.